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Archive for the ‘Poem’ Category

YOU

I breathe in Your Spirit . . . my troubles scatter

I know they lurk in the darkness for another chance to plague me.

I am Yours forever;

how could I forget?

I am precious in your sight.

You have taken me from darkness and judgment

and translated me into the kingdom of Your incredible light.

You

the Light

banish the darkness that threatens me

My enemies are no real threat

You are holding me.

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Racehorse

Racehorse

Something
Someone
caught my eye
hooked my interest
ensnared my heart

I feel Your restraint
on me
I sense Your restraint
on him

waiting like racehorses
at the gate
snorting, stomping
chomping at the bit
Your bit
we’re under Your yoke

Abba
I’m so sorry
Abba
I’m so sorry I wasn’t better
wasn’t braver
didn’t protect my heart
didn’t protect my purity
didn’t safeguard my soul

All my treasure I gave away
cast before swine
squandered on the roadside

I don’t have my gift
to give to him
the him you choose
for me

I rushed love
I wasted love
I lost love
who can find it?

I love You
only You
I need You.
I know You.
I know Your plans for me.
I know Your heart for me.
I know the alternative.
I know I’m safe with You.

So I wait at the gate
I keep my eyes on You
Abba

I don’t want
to want
or even think of
what You don’t have for me
Copyright 2018

19-fs

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The Father’s Voice

The Father’s Voice

Laying flat on cool marble
arms by my sides
the voice of the Father
calms me

from nowhere
an attack
I flinch
it requires everything
to be still

sword flashes
another strikes back
clang of metal on metal
a battle above my head

a final blow
my attacker is slain
dead
threat eliminated

Listen to my voice
my child
I am with you
I will not leave you
fear not

my palms are sweaty
my pulse is racing
breathing shallow and fast
heart pounding so hard it could split

Abba, Abba
He rubs my temple
Be still and know
from experience
I AM God

a voice calls to me
My beloved, come to Me
I long for His touch
I’m drawn

Copyright 2017

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Irreparably Broken

Irreparably Broken

I swim in the waters of my trial
your promises buoy me
I feel peace descend
A canopy over me
I will be all right

But clear waters turn swiftly to rolling white caps,
crashing on the sandy shore
from underneath, I feel the pull, the undertow of sorrow
pulling me, threatening me, holding me under the surface,
to drown me

I struggle to stay afloat,
reaching in my prayers for the arms of my Father, wanting You to take me from these waters
snatch me out, take me with You.
“Take me!” I cry. I want to be with You–completely with you

My tears are little comfort, my soul is bruised,
my confidence shattered,
I am broken.
I will never be the same.

You don’t correct me.
It is so. Irreparably broken.

Copyright 2016

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Fragrance

I met You daily
for me
to survive
for comfort
for healing
for strength
to push back the darkness

I never imagined
the fragrance you were leaving behind in me
over the years
weaving it into the very fibers of my soul
the essence of my being
the pungent perfume
the amazing aroma of the Beautiful One

I was desperate for You
my eyes consumed by my troubles
For many years
I couldn’t lift my head to look ahead
I couldn’t see beyond
prevailing problems
current chaos
daily demands

I didn’t worry if you were leaving Your fragrance with me
on me
in me
I didn’t know or care

But You, Adonai T’zva’ot,
You did
You knew it would help others
You knew it would waft over my sweet child
You knew I’d want this fragrance
long for this fragrance
one day
You knew

So You did for me what I couldn’t do for myself
You made this broken pot a useful vessel
in Your house
the Master’s house

In time
Your time
fullness of time
perfectly timed
You began the squeeze
pressure increased
pressure mounted

You were close, but no relief
more and more force applied
to my soul
to my being
enemies all around
enemies within
walls entombing me

blistering betrayal
brutal battles
boundless sorrows
rivers of tears
I was in a vice
You were tightening screws
increasing pressure
crushing, crushing, crushing

I thought I might die
I wished I might die
I wished and wished for the crushing to end

As You crushed me in that contraption called the human condition,
that mechanism for spiritual growth known as “that which is common to man”
something happened
something I never expected

At first, just a hint of fragrance was released
a brisk walk at dusk past the night-blooming Jasmine

then a wispy cloud floating around me
a bouquet of fresh-cut roses in the center of the kitchen table

still You weren’t finished
til the unrelenting crushing brought forth the full aroma
the blast of permeating fragrance

prostrate in fields of lavender
resting on the fresh buds
my pores seeping with fragrance
the fragrance of Yeshua
the fragrance of the Christ
the fragrance of hope

You are the sower
You are the living water
You are the vine dresser
You are Elohim
Creator of the very dirt and herb of the field

and You are the perfumer
bringing forth the finest scents
from Your flowers
crushing me
crushing us
that Your fragrance might remain

Copyright 2018

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Pink Roses

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Floating upward

Floating Upward

I’m a hot air balloon.
Ropes tied to stakes
restrain me
keep me near the ground.

I long for release

Cut the ropes, O God
that tether me to this place.
Set me free
–I long to float upward
to Your waiting arms.

 

Copyright MaryBeth Mullin 2018

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Armor

Armor

I got my armor today
belt
breastplate
spike shoes
shield
helmet
sword
all so shiny
so fancy

It’s all a little heady
I twirl around
holding my shield in one hand
waving my sword about with the other

Thank You, my King
for my commission in Your army
but am I combat-ready?

I’ve been dragging my armor around
some pieces on
some pieces hanging off
nothings as shiny

I forgot my helmet
and spent days trying to remember
who I was
whose I was

When I grew tired of carrying that big shield
I spent the day pinned down behind a rock
as flaming arrows of accusation
whizzed by my ears
and singed my hair

just before darkness fell
the King rode up
plucked me from my hiding place
seated me on His steed
no one mentioned my missing shield
or burn holes in my tunic

“My child, be wise.”
He said softly as he let me down
my cheeks grew warm

the most humiliating blow came today
I slid down a slippery slope
landed on my backside
insufficient spikes in my shoes

I’m waiting now to meet with the King
I’m sure He’s upset
I’m a failure
but if I can’t be a soldier for the King,
who would I be?

my thoughts drift to the King
brave in battle, strong, majestic
sometimes terrifying
to His enemies

Then I remember
He is a tender Father
loving husband
kind Master
soft-hearted lover of children
a lamb

as I remember
a great wind blows open the shutters
sunlight bathes the great hall

“Abba! Abba!”
I run to Him
“I’m so sorry.”
tears soak my cheeks
“Can you forgive me?”

“My child,”
He calls me by my special name
the name He gave me

I sit with Him in His big chair
He gently holds my face to His
I breathe in His familiar scent
resting in His embrace
I exchange my tears of failure
for His unconditional, never-failing love

I awoke
covered by my favorite blanket
the sun far spent

He never spoke to me of my failures
rather He met me
in the early morning
patiently teaching me of the armor
about the enemy
how each piece was designed
how each piece could protect

He helped me strengthen my arms
to carry the shield of faith
He taught me how to add spikes to my shoes
to hold my ground
He helped me wield my sword
with strength and accuracy
I became a great warrior

I will never forget how ineffective
I was
I am
without armor

nor shall I forget the weapons
are for standing
the battle is His

He is my Protector
my Fortress
my High Tower
my Stronghold
my Deliverer

Blessed be the name of the King of Kings
Commander of the angel armies
Champion of the sons and daughters of God

Copyright 2018 MaryBeth Mullin

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